What he's thankful for.

Today's bible study story was about the Israelites and all they had to be thankful for. God's cloud was leading them through the desert, He gave them manna every morning, He helped them find water when they were thirsty, and they had Moses to lead them. But still, the Israelites complained!

After class, Grayson's teacher came to me to tell me a story about Grayson. They were sitting at the table during snack time talking about what they were thankful for. Grayson, who doesn't have a whole lot to say at bible study said, "Mommy and Daddy." Now, you have to understand that his typical response to questions is something silly like, "burger and fries," or "apple juice." So, for him to go off script and say, "Mommy and Daddy" melted my heart! What did we do to deserve such a beautiful child?

I'm beginning to lose count!

Alright, you know it's getting bad if you have to look at your own blog to remember how many weeks you've been waiting! Today makes 26! Friday marks 6 months. As far as we know, the average is still 6.5 months. However, there is a conference call with our agency this evening in which they may update this. I, unfortunately, will not be home this evening so I will wait until tomorrow to listen to a recording of the conference call. It has been great to be with an agency that really tries to keep us informed every step of the way. I'm really starting to get anxious to see some progress...any progress...even if it's not my own....just something to let me know this program is still running!!!! I need to see some referrals people!!! Okay, I digress.

Yesterday was a very nice day in that I didn't think once about the FBI list or checking my email. Me and two other college roommates went to Columbus, OH to visit our roommate that is getting ready to have a baby girl! I know she probably begs to differ, but the nine months has FLOWN by! I can't believe she's going to have a baby! I'm just so excited for them to get to experience the sheer joy of being parents. They will make such great parents!

He can count to 10!

When did this happen? When did he get so big and start doing things like recognizing letters and counting! With a promise of Fruit Loops I was able to get him counting on video!

25 weeks!

Wow! Hard to believe today makes 25 weeks on the waiting list. Next Friday marks 6 months. Average wait time last month was 6.5 months. We're getting closer:)

Valentine's Day weekend

We had a nice time this weekend. Saturday we went down to Indy with our friends, Drew and Katrina. We had lunch at Red Robin then headed to the Children's Museum. It was SUPER busy. I'm not sure if it was something to do with it being Engineering Day or if it was Valentine's Day or if it was a little of both. Grayson had a really good time, as usual, but it was a little worrisome for us as we were afraid if we looked away for a split second he would disappear in the crowd. Luckily, we made it home with as many as we left with!

On the adoption front, nothing new! I have found a new peace and patience that I was lacking last week. The thought that this WILL happen and probably relatively soon were comforting. I can't begin to tell you what a blessing being in Bible Study Fellowship has been for me this year. Not only is it a great way to dive into God's word and a nice activity a couple of days a week (not to mention the hours of lessons and lesson plans). But, more than anything, it has allowed me to truly see God's work in my life. I have prayed everday for patience during this adoption, and each day, much to my amazement, I find just enough patience for the day, or hour, or minute. And, sometimes it is a minute-by-minute thing. But, I find I can pause, think to myself, "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord," or sometimes I find comfort in, "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you," and if those don't work, "My grace is sufficient...My strength is made perfect in weakness," always does the trick.

It's interesting to look back and see how much I've grown since Grayson's adoption. Each day I prayed that things would go quickly and for Grayson's safety and so on. But, I don't feel I ever truly trusted God. I still wanted to control the situation - I wanted my will to be done, not His. And, when Grayson did finally come home, I was certainly grateful to God and have been every day since, knowing that is was His grace and mercy that led us to Grayson. But, I never truly trusted that God would take care of us. And, I certainly never entertained the thought that His will may be different than ours. This time, not only do I completely trust God with this adoption, I also realize there is always the possibility that something could happen that would prevent this adoption from happening - that's just the way international adoption and life work. And, though I would be devestated, and would grieve the loss of this child that we have imagined for so long now, even this could not cause me to doubt God and His plan for our lives.

As a disclaimer, this is not to say that I will never have moments of impatience or even moments of sadness and "why, God" questions. But, this is to say that I am putting this adoption and my life in God's hands and letting Him do things in His perfect timing.

Okay, that wasn't supposed to be so long....here are some pictures from the weekend!

Week 24 has come and gone!

We've been waiting 24 weeks today. On to week 25. There were a couple of referrals late last week, but nothing that moved us up the list. However, just the fact that there has been a pretty steady flow of referrals is encouraging! Honestly, with the way the courts are getting backed up, there is a part of me that is content waiting on a referral. I know from Grayson's adoption that the hard wait is yet to come.

However, on the other hand, I am very anxious to find out how old and how big this little boy is. I didn't think I would want to buy too much for him, knowing that we have so much great stuff from Grayson. But, it's KILLING me to go to Target and not be able to buy any adorable clothes or other fun baby stuff. So, I'm sure I will end up buying a little more than what I originally planned:)

23 weeks!

Today marks 23 weeks on the waiting list! Each day brings us that much closer to seeing our little boy for the first time. We're pretty sure we've already been matched and are just waiting for all the paperwork to be gathered. I have to say that this is a comforting thought - knowing that there is a little boy waiting for us in some orphanage in Ethiopia. I just can't wait to get my hands on him and hug him and cuddle him and tell him how much we've prayed for him. This is a big part of why we have chosen to adopt - the firm belief that every child in this world deserves to be loved, hugged, kissed, and told they are wanted.

I'll leave you with a few pictures of Grayson, our precious boy that is daily smothered in hugs and kisses. He'll probably be glad when there is a baby brother to share the annoyance of the constant hugs and kisses!

Mom, please, enough pictures.

One smile, then leave me alone.

Another baby boy referral!

Okay, I just had to post because I can barely contain my excitement. There was another baby boy referral yesterday!!!!! This puts us at #4...or #2 if the two families open to siblings are referred siblings. It's this crazy feeling of wanting to jump up and down but then there's this force that keeps you in your seat, telling you it could still be another month before you get your referral. Ahhh! This crazy world of international adoption. There is absolutely nothing like it. I hate it for the way it makes you feel like you're losing your mind. I love it for the way it makes you feel like you're on cloud nine. And, of course, I'm obsessed with it for the way God works through it to unite families and their children. Oh, the rollercoaster of emotions!

The fact that we are getting closer to our referral has made me stop and think about the day we get "the call." Will we both be home? Will I be calling Aaron, telling him to rush home? Will I be able to a hold of him (surely with all the communication devices that exist)? Will we videotape our call or just leave it to our memories to remember the day? Will we be able to get a hold of our parents to tell them? Will we cry (okay, was that even a question...I will sob)? What will Grayson think? Only time will tell!

Have a great weekend!

22 weeks and a beautiful, snowy day!

Today marks 22 weeks! I can't believe we've made it this far!

We got quite a bit of snow between yesterday and last night. And, it's still coming down! All the schools around here were either on a 2-hour delay or were closed, except, of course, Lafayette schools. I don't know if Grayson will ever get a snow day! His little friends that happen to live outside of city limits, however, may never go to school! Despite Lafayette not being on a delay, our bible study leader's meeting was canceled. Which means, no bible study tomorrow either. It will be nice to have the extra time this week, but I'm a little disappointed. I had such a neat day planned for the kids tomorrow. The lesson was about God choosing Aaron and his sons as priests. I had gone to Burger King to get little crowns for all the kids and they were going to get to decorate them and wear them for certain activities throughout the day. Oh well!

We did get a chance to get out in the snow yesterday. I'm hoping Aaron will take Grayson out again today. He really liked it. He just has trouble keeping the snow out of his mittens. I remember putting bread bags over our feet on top of our socks to keep our feet dry! Maybe Ziploc bags would work!?!

Staying busy...but starting to get excited!

We are staying busier than ever with bible study, church, hanging with friends and family...but, I'm starting to get so excited thinking about our referral. Realistically, we probably have another month. But that's not that far off considering we've already waited 5! I'm really starting to think more and more about how old he will be. Most of the little boys referred seem to be between 5 and 7 months old, which is perfect. However, if he were 12 mos. old I would be just as ecstatic. I'm really hoping he and Grayson will be less than 2 years apart. I just know they will be best buds.

Carrie and I are 2 years apart and I think about how much fun we had together. She was always very tall for her age, and I just average. A lot of people thought we were twins and I loved that. We would dress alike just to fool people. She didn't like it as much as I did - she has always insisted on being seen as an individual and not just Emily's sister. I would even try to take is as far as dressing our dolls alike..she often resisted. There were of course the occasional misunderstandings. One argument while playing Barbies led to me throwing a Barbie at her and it's head popping off. The tears instantly turned to hysterical laughter and we completely forgot about whatever it was that had us angry. Then there's the incident that has still not been settled. I dropped a doll down to her out of the treehouse...she didn't catch it. It unfortunately led to the doll's eyes coming loose. You could put them back in place, but the next time you looked over her eyes would be crossed. I of course insisted she play with that doll because she dropped it! She claims she wasn't ready and I threw it prematurely. To make matters worse, when we got in fights I would make my baby dolls say things like, "I don't like Aunt Carrie, she's mean!" Those comments were eventually deemed unfair and were not allowed to be made by either party. Most of time we resolved our arguments without Mom's assistance. On the rare occasion that Mom would step in, she would take us downstairs, stand us against the wall, and read us the riot act. We would instantly join forces either laughing at her as she yelled at us, or our favorite, we would hug each other, cry, and insist we were best friends and Mom was mean. Oh, the fun Grayson and Abram will have!

Totally off topic, but here is a picture of Grayson with the boots we got him this weekend. He loves tromping through the snow! However, he picked some up today without a glove on and started crying!

Another happy day for Gladney families!

I can't believe it! There was another baby boy referral this week! We are now #5 on the list of those waiting for a boy or either gender! I sure hope the referrals keep coming! Congrats to all of those receiving referrals the last two weeks!

21 weeks and moving up in the world!

Today marks 21 weeks on the waiting list! And, even better, there was another baby boy referral! This means we are 6 on the list (4 not counting the people open to siblings)!!! However, I have to guard myself from too much excitement. It seems lately there will be a week with a few referrals and then a couple of weeks with no referrals. So, it may be a couple of weeks before we see any more referrals, and if they are for little girls, it won't move us up any. But, at this point I'm confident (as much as one can be in this process) that we have been matched with our little boy and are just waiting for all his documents to be gathered and medical reports/tests to be conducted. I'm really hoping that we will only wait 6 months rather than 7....but, like I said, I'm staying guarded!

Through Grayson's eyes

Grayson loves for me to take pictures. He can barely stand still long enough for me to actually take the picture before he is right there beside me wanting to see the picture on our digital camera.

So, yesterday when we were out and about and saw a Little Tikes digital camera at Radio Shack for only $25 (half off), we decided Grayson needed his own camera. He really likes it so far despite the fact that he doesn't quite get it. He holds it up and says, "CHEESE!" He's taken a lot of self-portraits, unintentionally I believe. Today, he's decided it's much more fun for him to tell me what to take pictures of. Which, I will admit the camera is a little tricky. You have to hold it really still to get a good picture and the button is on the front which is difficult for Grayson's little hands to reach. So, here is a day at home through Grayson's eyes.

A bowl of Fruit Loops and raisins.

Two stuffed puppy dogs.

Grayson using his potty.

A laundry basket of assorted balls.

Great week for Gladney families!

Yesterday Gladney gave out 3 referrals! Yay! And, two of them were for little boys! Double yay! This means we've moved up to #7 on the list waiting for a boy or either gender. Also, I looked closer at the unofficial waiting list, and two of the families waiting on either gender are also open to sibling groups. If they in fact get sibling groups, this would put us a #5 on this list! I still think it could be another couple of months until we hear something, but it was so great to move up the list a little!

All this excitement came exactly on the day I bought paint for the nursery/guest room. This exciting news definitely motivated me to get going! Here are a few pictures so far!

20 weeks!

20 weeks down, and I've stopped guessing on how many to go! Last I checked, we are #9 on the list of those requesting a boy or "either gender." But, this still doesn't give me much insight as to how long it will be! I guess the good thing is that we are moving up the list, as slow as it may be!

On a positive note, we are getting very beautiful snow here in Lafayette today. It wasn't so beautiful as I was making my way to my bible study leader's meeting this morning. But, from my nice warm house, it's beautiful!

19 weeks!

Yesterday marked 19 weeks of waiting! I can't believe we've made it this far! With all the chaos of the holidays, I actually had to stop and count how long it had been!

Where do I start???

Well, the holidays are officially over and we're getting back into the groove of things. The last week and a half or so have been VERY busy, but very, very blessed!

First, we had a great Christmas! Definitely one of the best I can remember. Grayson was so much fun this year. As soon as he opened up a present he wanted it out of the box, batteries in it, turned on and ready to play! This made it a little difficult to get him to open up all his presents. I eventually just started opening them for him.

Aaron was very surprised this year. His parents got him a Wii! He had NO idea. I have known since Thanksgiving and was so excited for him, but still managed to keep the secret! It was so great. It was like he was 10 years old again. He was just so surprised and excited!

I definitely thought about Abram. But, not in a sad, "oh, I wish you were here" sort of way. It was more a "I can't wait till next year" kind of way.

After Christmas we headed to Florida with my family. We spent the week on the beach. Grayson loved the pool and the sand! Definitely a huge improvement from last year. Last year, he was struggling with his first ear infection and pink eye. This year he was all smiles!

We got home late last night and have been unpacking ALL day! It's good to be home and in our routine, even if I am a little overwhelmed with laundry and unfinished bible study.

Here are some pictures from Christmas morning and Florida. More to come later.

This is why we will wait.....

You go along this adoption journey, doing everything everyone asks of you. Sign here, notarize here, re-do this document, this one's too long, this one expired, make this check out to us, that one to them, oh, and that one needs to be a money order. And then, you are finally placed on the waiting list. At this point you're excited, but reserved. You don't want to get too excited because you know you have a long wait. So, you just settle into this rhythm of trying to get through each day, each week, each month, counting the days, but trying not to obsess or even let yourself believe the adoption is really ever going to happen. Then, you kind of stop and think...what are we even waiting for again? Could someone remind me? You've protected yourself from the excitement so much, that you begin to forget what it is you're supposed to be excited about. I walk past the crib set up in the guest room every day and rarely even try to picture it with a child in it. Then, last night I looked up at a picture in the family room and I remembered EXACTLY what we are waiting for....


We are waiting for the day that we get to feel this way about another baby boy. We so often stop and say that we can't imagine any other child as our son, and that's part of the problem, we can't. But, I know that we will. I know that once this little boy becomes a reality, a face, a name, a story, we will feel the same way we felt when we saw Grayson for the first time. I look forward to the day I look up at the pictures in the family room and see BOTH of my boys and think, "I can't imagine any other boys being our sons." And this is why we will wait.

The Darlings passed court today!

One of the families here in the Lafayette area had their court date today. Justin emailed the group just a bit ago and said they passed! Abeba is officially their daughter! Check out their blog to see pictures of their beautiful daughter!

In other, less exciting news...we've been on the waiting list 16 weeks today! We're hanging in there!

Thank goodness God doesn't always give us what we want!

I've been sitting on the computer this afternoon during Grayson's nap, checking email, reading blogs, trying to figure out how long everyone's referrals are taking, trying to figure out when we'll get ours. When we were put on the waiting list on August 27th, I thought we would definitely have our referral in time for Christmas. Well, the current trend suggests we have at least another couple of months to wait. So, I started to feel a little sorry for myself.

Then, I was humbled by a thought. When we were put on the waiting list for Grayson, the wait time was 2-4 weeks. Most people were getting referrals no later than 4 weeks. We were placed on the waiting list on September 9th. I was very patiently waiting up until about the 4 week mark. I then became very impatient and a little sad. I remember crying to Aaron that I just wanted to see a picture of our baby (all seems a little pitiful now as we know we will wait 6 or 7 months for Abram's referral). I thought for sure we would have a referral by Drew and Katrina's wedding on October 7th. As that day came and went I became even more upset.

Thank goodness God doesn't always give us what we want. If we had gotten a referral in 4 weeks as most people did, we would have received a referral on October 9th. Grayson was not born until October 17th. Jeremiah 1:5 says, ""Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart." God had already set Grayson apart for us. However, He couldn't give us pictures of our child in that 4 week window that our agency had promised because OUR son had not yet been born. I continue to be amazed at the awesome ways God has worked in our lives. So many times He does things in such subtle ways that it takes us 2 years and a few minutes of feeling sorry for ourselves before we even recognize His work in our lives. Don't get me wrong, I have always known that Grayson was chosen by God to be our son and that it was only by God's grace and mercy that we brought him home from Guatemala in just over 6 months. However, I'm now able to wait on our referral with a new sense of patience. Jeremiah 1:5 confirms that God knows who our son is and He has already set him apart for us.

I guess I should clarify and say this doesn't mean I won't have days of extreme impatience. It just means that those days will hopefully be fewer and those days will be more tolerable knowing that God has already chosen our son.

As it turned out, we ended up waiting 7 weeks for Grayson's referral. Completely unheard of to wait that long for a referral of a baby boy at that point in time for our agency. But, thank goodness we did wait that long. And, 7 weeks or 7 months, I will wait however long it takes to be matched with OUR son.

Here are some pictures we received with Grayson's referral! What a wonderful time that was!